So I’m turning 39 in a few days and I’ve decided I want to change careers. I know, I’m not the first person to make such a decision so late in the game, but it feels…. monumental. Overwhelming, even.
Part of the problem is that I am incapable of baby steps. I want to do it all, right now, and done perfectly from the start. This sort of thinking can be paralyzing, even as I try to build this blog and get a new Twitter account up and running. I am toiling over the small stuff, like ensuring perfection in terms of how said blog and Twitter pages look. It’s utter madness as I fight my urge to not roll these pages out until I feel they are viewable for the masses. They must look perfect or people won’t come back! won’t read! won’t share and support!
Honestly, my need to be a perfectionist has been my own worst enemy… but I believe I can harness it for good. I just need to learn to take things one step at a time so that I create a process, and lifestyle, that is sustainable.
I feel like a little kid with her face pressed against the glass of a window at the gym; I see all these people in there doing things I would like to do. They look happy and healthy. They look positive and energetic. And I want to be part of that…. but I feel like I am on the outside of it all. And I want to change careers and be part of an industry I know virtually nothing about?? I don’t even go to a gym! I am the kind of girl who likes to get her sweat on to P90X in the comfort of her living room when she won’t embarrass herself in front of others. Where I have fewer excuses not to do it, as my “workout room” is a mere 6 feet away.
This blog will be my journey, wherever that journey leads me. I will take my baby steps as I get back into working out, after too long an absence. And then I will see how to grow my passion from there into a direction that best suits me; will it be nutrition, a deep personal interest for me? Will my workouts lead me to grow beyond my living room and into the gym? Will I find a teacher and mentor who will help lead me in a direction that speaks to me?
I am (nearly) 39 and I have yet to decide what I want to be when I grow up… but I’m going to find out!